Understanding Self-Acceptance in EFT Tapping
Sep 01, 2024
“Acceptance doesn’t mean resignation; it means understanding that something is what it is and that there’s got to be a way through it.” – Michael J. Fox
If you’ve tried EFT Tapping, you might have wondered why we include a statement of acceptance after we state what we are working on. It can be confusing at first: What does it really mean when we say, “Even though I have this problem, I accept myself”? You might resist saying this because you desire different circumstances – you don’t want this issue in your life. So, does accepting it mean you’re inviting more of it into your life? Absolutely not.
The idea of self-acceptance, especially in the context of EFT Tapping, isn’t about resigning yourself to your current situation or settling for less. Instead, it’s about recognizing where you are right now, which allows for real and meaningful change to happen. As psychologist Carl Rogers noted, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”
By accepting yourself, your feelings, and your current situation, you are creating a safe space for growth. Rogers introduced the idea of unconditional positive regard, which means accepting and supporting someone regardless of their actions or words. When we apply this concept to ourselves, it means embracing who we are without judgment. Imagine speaking with someone who listens without judging you – how much easier is it to open up? Now, imagine being that non-judgmental presence for yourself. Adding self-judgment only compounds the problem and can prevent you from moving forward.
Think of self-acceptance as identifying your current location on a map. If your goal is to reach point B, you first need to acknowledge that you are at point A. Saying “I accept myself” is like stating, “I know where I am right now. I’m not running from it, fighting it, or avoiding it any longer. I’m at point A, and that’s okay. This is my starting point, and I’m free to move in a new direction.”
Once you bring the issue into your conscious awareness, you can address it directly. It no longer needs to be a hidden, subconscious program that runs in the background, potentially sabotaging your conscious efforts. By acknowledging it openly, it loses its power to undermine you.
In EFT Tapping, we often use the phrase “Even though I have this problem, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.” This goes even further in expressing compassion toward oneself, fostering a nurturing internal environment where healing and positive change are more likely to take root.
If these statements of acceptance don’t feel authentic to you, try some of these alternatives:
- “I’m open to accepting myself.”
- “I’m open to the possibility of accepting myself.”
- “I’m willing to learn to accept myself.”
- “I accept this feeling and where I am right now.”
- “I acknowledge that this is where I’m starting.”
- “I choose to be kind to myself.”
- “I can be kind and compassionate to myself.”
So, the next time you tap and say, “Even though I have this problem, I accept myself,” remember that you are not resigning yourself to the problem. Instead, you are acknowledging your current state, embracing yourself with kindness, and preparing the ground for growth and positive change!
Be sure to check out my tapping video on Self-Acceptance on YouTube.